Here are some brief thoughts on developing accountable relationships…
2 Corinthians 13:5 – “Examine yourselves to see whether you are in the faith; test yourselves. Do you not realize that Christ Jesus is in you–unless, of course, you fail the test?”
Swimming Against the Current
Examining yourself a couple of times throughout each year isn’t a bad idea. In fact, some consider it a key to your Christian growth. It helps you assess whether or not you are moving forward in your relationship with Christ, standing still…or actually moving backward.
If we think of our spiritual life as swimming in the ocean, we can picture ourselves having to swim with all our might toward our goal (which is Christlikeness). For if we aren't intentionally and fiercely moving in that direction, then we are either swimming toward the wrong goal, (the wrong direction), or, thinking we're treading water, staying in one place, we actually discover (sometimes too late) that we've been drifting with current the whole time.
But rejoice, if you are truly in Christ then there is good news. The apostle Paul says in Philippians 1:6 that he was confident that God who began a good work in you would carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. In other words, God’s not going to give up on you.
So pray for a fresh filling of God’s Spirit in your life to help you can persevere in “swimming” the race set before you. And rejoice that you don’t have to swim it alone. It is vital to remember that it is the Spirit of God who gives you the power, desire, and direction to finish the race.
But Not Swimming Alone
And yet, there are also brothers and sisters in Christ who are invested in seeing you finish your journey with Christ well. An accountable relationship can be a faithful tool in the hands of a godly friend. But it often takes time to develop these trusting and open relationships with such people. Yet it’s worth the effort.
Below are a few links to some great articles on the subject of accountability as well as some pages of penetrating accountability questions for you to ponder regarding how you’re doing in your faith.
And, as always, let me know what I can do to help you. It’s why I’m here.
Accountability by Ken Boa – Great article on the subject. A must read.
Are You Leading A Hazardous Life? by Jeff Miller – These are the questions/statements that I read aloud this morning.
How to Conquer a Secret Thought Life by Pat Morley – Morley knows men. This is a great article on dealing with the garbage that’s already in your head…and how to keep more garbage from finding its way into your head.
How to Have an Accountable Relationship by Pat Morley – Good practical tools on how to gather with other men for the purpose of holding one another accountable in your faith…which includes every sphere of your life.
Accountability Questions by Ramesh Richard
ACCOUNTABILITY: Pursuing Vital Relationships, Part One: Getting Ready by Jim Clayton
ACCOUNTABILITY: Pursuing Vital Relationships, Part Two – Play Ball! by Jim Clayton
And, of course, I should mention the Spiritual Life Checkup that I put together.
I hope these resources will serve you well as you pursue the likeness of Christ in your life…for every sphere of your life.
Grace and Truth,
The Upright Man
Psalm 11:7 – For the Lord is righteous, he loves justice; the upright man will see his face.
Proverbs 11:3 – The integrity of the upright guides them, but the unfaithful are destroyed by their duplicity.
Proverbs 11:10-11 – When the righteous prosper, the city rejoices; when the wicked perish, there are shouts of joy. Through the blessing of the upright a city is exalted, by the mouth of the wicked it is destroyed.
Proverbs 11:30 – The fruit of the righteous is a tree of life, and he who wins souls is wise.
God promises blessing to the upright (righteous) man; he will see God’s face. The integrity of the upright man guides him through this life. When the upright man prospers, the whole city rejoices for it knows his success is good for everyone. The fruit of the upright man is a tree of life. Such good news accompanies the upright man because, as such, he reflects the righteousness of his Lord and honors him in the process.
Any promise of blessing that God makes to those who live upright lives is purely due to his own gracious character. He doesn’t owe us a reward for doing what we ought to do. Yet he does promise to lavish blessing upon us when we do. More than that, it’s only by God’s power and guidance we’re even able to move in a righteous direction in the first place. Only the redeemed of the Lord may have confidence that his Spirit is doing such a work in their hearts, minds, and souls.
Yet, we have the responsibility to keep in step with the Spirit… to partner with God (never without him) in this grand pursuit. Thus, the godly man will daily seek God’s grace, strength and wisdom for the faithful and upright living of each day.
How are you doing with this? Is this the desire of your heart? Maybe it’s not, but you are beginning to realize it ought to be. Wherever you are, I want to help you move forward in your pursuit of godly manhood. Please let me know how I may direct or encourage you.
Rise up, O man of God and live the righteous life for which you were created, redeemed, and called to live.
Your Brother in Christ,
Well, I did it. For better or worse, I wrote a book (I'm not much of a marketer). It comes out of years of working with and discipling men.
And, according to my mother, who is a godly woman, it is an easy read. I'm pretty sure she meant that as a compliment. Here's a little bit about it...
Before men can live godly lives and go into all the world to make disciples for Christ, they must first have a firm foundation.
The foundation all men need is the Gospel of Jesus Christ. Only when a man becomes a new creature in Christ can he grow in Christlikeness.
This godly man will then follow his Lord into every sphere of his life, making a difference in his home, church, workplace, community, culture, and world. He does not pursue such godliness in isolation, but in the fellowship of other godly men. This is how God’s Kingdom transforms the world. But it must start with the Gospel.
Foundations for Godly Manhood encourages men to pursue all God created, redeemed, and calls them to be by building their lives upon the firm foundation of the Gospel of Jesus Christ and his life-giving, life-transforming truth revealed in Holy Scripture.
Share this with men you're witnessing to. It works for one-on-one discipleship, small groups, or read it devotionally for yourself.
You can click here to order it from Lulu.com.
As many years as “small groups” has been a buzz-phrase and been emphasized in countless books, seminars, conferences, etc., (perhaps even over-emphasized) I can’t help but be astonished when I learn of a church that doesn’t have any small groups or Bible studies up and running.
I know the Bible doesn’t say, “Go into all the world and create small groups,” and yet small groups are a powerful and effective way to help make disciples who will last for the long haul. Certainly John Wesley, in my own tradition, believed and practiced that. (Two great resources to check out on Wesley’s view of discipleship are Steve Manskar’s Accountable Discipleship and Kevin Watson’s Blueprint for Discipleship.)
Because my ministry-focus as Minister of Discipleship is… well… “discipleship,” I’ve been asked many times how to start a small group ministry, men’s ministry, or a Bible study, etc. There are many helpful suggestions that could be given (and, as I’ve mentioned, Manskar and Watson discuss many). However, my initial default answer to those questions is to always share what I think is most important: Stick to Scripture.
Groups that focus on fellowship and accountability absolutely have their place. There’s no such thing as Lone Ranger Christianity. We were created for community and we grow in community. Emphasizing prayer is, of course, vital. However, if we’re going to make disciples by teaching folks to obey everything Christ has commanded, then it is essential to teach who this “Commander” is, what he commanded, and how to carry out his commands.
An occasional topical study is fine, provided that Scripture is the primary source. (In my men’s ministry, for example, we have studied prayer, integrity, temptation, etc.) There are many useful topical Bible study-guides out there to be sure (I’ve used many). And yet, I have personally seen the most spiritual growth in those who are in the studies where we simply plow through
a particular book of the Bible – chapter by chapter, verse by verse. Nothing fancy. Nothing novel.
The Bible is, as the saying goes, timely and timeless. It already is more relevant than this morning’s news, so we don’t have to “make it relevant.” To be sure, we need to help folks see the truth and relevance of it, as well as how it applies to their lives. This takes faithful shepherding and the guidance of the Holy Spirit.
God’s Word is the only thing God has said will accomplish what he has intended. It alone is God-breathed and useful for teaching, correcting, rebuking and training God’s people in righteousness so
they will be equipped for every good work (2 Tim. 3:16-17). About God’s Word, the author of the letter to the Hebrews writes,
For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart. (Hebrews 12:4)
Jesus chastises the religious leaders of his day by telling them that, “You are in error because you do not know the Scriptures or the power of God.” (Matthew 22:29)
We could add to this list many other texts in both the Old and New Testaments. The point is that God’s Word must be our primary tool in making disciples (of course, always in complete reliance upon God’s Spirit working in and through such efforts).
Paraphrasing Jesus, C.S. Lewis said that if you pursue the world first and God second, you end up getting neither. But if you pursue God first, you not only get God, but God also meets our earthly needs as well. To apply that to small groups, I believe it’s important to pursue God and our relationship with him through the study of his Word with others. And when we do, I believe God meets our real needs, our felt needs, and many other things besides. But we have to trust him enough to pursue him in and through his Word.
Grace and Truth,
Check Out My Book
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